Another in a series of things I have been doing.....

I've been sort of wandering around in my mind over the last 36 hours (a) trying to remember some of the bits of Friday night that have gone missing, (b) thinking how much of a great night it was, (c) thinking life should be enjoyed like that more of the time, and (d) wondering how can I make sure that it is.

My answer to (d) is radical change in my life - a paradigm shift no less. The answer to (e) is fuckedifIknow.

On Friday night I met up with some friends I'd worked with in Hertfordshire and it was a year since I'd last seen some of them. It wasn't so much that we were drinking heavily, it was more that we started drinking just after 6pm and didn't stop till about 5am. We started off at MD's house, moved on to a pub in Stevenage, and then returned to MD's house to do some serious damage to his wine supplies before crashing exhasted.

On Saturday morning MD made breakfast before I left around midday. In all that time, apart from the 4-5 hours sleep, the conversation flowed effortlessly. It felt that we all really enjoyed each other's company. The only time there was an awkward moment was when someone smacked me on the head after I'd made a teasing remark. As I remember it, there followed a shocked silence that lasted at least one sixteenth of a second, thereafter the incident seemed very funny.

(Mind you, I was quite drunk at the time and I'm thinking that maybe I was just behaving like that bloke in the advert who thinks he's Superman chasing after the balloon.)

The last sentence notwithstanding, I have come to the conclusion that I have in the past regarded this lot as just some people I worked with and have a few things in common. It has dawned on me today that actually they are my friends.

To the casual reader, indeed to anyone who is not me, this may seem like an odd thing to say. But my life has been one where I have had friends, who when I look back, wanted me to be something I wasn't. A true friend is someone who enjoys my company for what I am....

Oh bollocks; I'm certainly not inebriated tonight but I think I've completely failed to get over what I was trying to say. I can't be bothered trying to get it right anymore and there's no way I'm going to delete this now so make of it what you will....